from the inside out

Jehovah Jireh - My Provider

2011-05-15T17:43:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to share a nugget/download/revelation that the Lord gave me this morning. In the sermon today, the pastor was talking about some of the names of God. He said that we misuse "Jehovah Jireh" the most often. We use it like a pin number in an ATM machine! When we have BIG needs, we call upon Jehovah Jireh, our Provider! While we know that He will provide for ALL our needs, we must look at the context of this name.

It was originally used by Abraham after the Lord provided the ram in the thicket to be the sacrifice instead of his son, Isaac.... (revelation begins to unfold)!!! We know that the ram is a symbol of Christ, being the sacrifice that God provided for OUR salvation! Therefore, Jehovah Jireh means that the Lord PROVIDES US WITH JESUS!!!!! Whew!! Does that ever change my plea!?!?!

While I know that Jesus is the ANSWER for everything....what a paradigm to starting praying in my time of need to Jehovah Jireh and REMEMBER that while I may not see an immediate provision in my worldly need, He will always give me JESUS!! I should always look for the provision to be MORE of Jesus!!! Wow!! I have totally misused that name!! I Love these times where the Lord speaks so clearly!

So, in closing, I will just say that I do DECLARE, Jehovah Jireh....that God is my Provider of Jesus!! That "my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in CHRIST JESUS!!" Philippians 4:19

Praying that I would APPLY this new revelation to this new journey on the road to health!! More, Jesus, MORE!! :)

A New Journey with Jesus!!

2011-05-14T06:18:00.000-07:00

I'd like to say that today marks a NEW journey for me with changing my lifestyle and setting goals. My fear is not following through. My hope is that writing it down will help keep me accountable. My REAL hope is Christ alone! So, today I wake up feeling good about starting a hard journey and I WILL say "today marks a NEW path that will change my life!"

I have recently started with a "life-coach" who is a friend of mine that is helping me to set reasonable goals and try to achieve them while being conscience of the obstacles! I am also joining a new gym today, the nearest YMCA, and will hopefully begin a new relationship with a personal trainer and start getting in on some classes! I want to make a food plan as well and really try to shape my eating into a more healthy lifestyle.

Spiritually, I believe that as I have literally tried EVERYTHING on my own in the past 10+ years, only God can help me, through the Resurrection POWER of Christ as the Holy Spirit, ALIVE in me! I believe that my spiritual, physical, and emotional health are all tied together! I want to pray and declare who I am and stand upon a HOLY energy that only He can give. I want to PRAY through this journey, surrender to His leading and working in me, break the strongholds that have held me back from even trying: laziness, apathy, loneliness, frustration, disappointment. As I begin to see results physically, I want to become a stronger force for KINGDOM advancing spiritually.

I need community. I need people to encourage me and pray, to hold me accountable, to check on my progress, to hold my arms up when I am weak.

I want all of these things that I am wriitng so that God may have MORE GLORY through me! So that His name alone would be lifted high! I want to attribute it ALL to Him, not of myself or my strength, but His working out of my salvation! When people ask "how did you do it?", I want to only boast in Christ!

I post this as a declaration of a new beginning! A fresh start! A journey to a healthier me in EVERY way! Thank you for your support and prayers! I'll try to keep posted along the way! :)

"So whether you eat of drink or whatever you do, do it ALL for the Glory of God." That is the Believer's FREEDOM!! Lord, may it be said of me!

This is the way, walk in it!

2010-10-18T16:04:00.000-07:00

So I haven't "blogged" in a while and have no excuse except: facebook! But after revisiting the idea, I thought maybe it would help me record and process. So, here I am again. I would say that I have been struggling lately. That life has been hard and taken a toll on my spirit. That I seem to have symptoms of things being wrong spiritually, but can't pinpoint the exact issue, distraction, or area of bondage. I know that I have been searching more than ever, listening harder than before, quieting my spirit, shifting my focus, redirecting my gaze, examining my heart, and begging Jesus to transform my mind! I will say this....it's HARD to follow Christ!

The idea of community is something that I long for and maybe a concept for another day, but it seems so far out of reach. Maybe I fantasize what true community would look like. Maybe I daydream about brothers and sisters that truly meet one another's needs and act out of love instead of selfishness. Maybe that's not so far out of reach as I think it is. But I do know that I feel lonely as a follower and am desperate for kindred spirits to walk daily with.

But despite my complaining and struggles, and "out-of-sortness"....this I know for sure: that I am called to FOLLOW HIM! No matter the cost, no matter the hardships, suffering, rejection, abandonment, thistles, thorns, storms, clouds, and pain. That through it all, I will be able to say: I HAVE found a joy....that jumps over sadness! His promises are real. His love is complete. He has known and felt everything that I am afflicted with. He offers me fullness.

I don't know the next step of this journey. I am asking for a place to fit in, for a community to plug in to, for an assignment to serve. But in the meantime, in the quiet and secret place, He beckons me and says: "Kristen, you belong to Me!"

Yesterday, as I was worshipping from a pit-like place, I felt the Lord ask me: "If there were no one else beside you, if you had no one, would you still worship Me?" Through tears and conviction I knew He was asking me if HE WAS ENOUGH! And I cried out in desperation and heaviness and exclaimed: "YES, Lord! Yes!" That was a huge breakthrough for me, even though the truth is that I do have people beside me.

A few weeks ago a friend of mine had a vision of me walking along a beach and coming to the land's end at the ocean. I had to choose whether to go right or left. I thought about this vision and had two ideas. One, that walking in the sand is hard and that's how I had been feeling for the last six months. And two, that either way the Lord led, right or left, would be beautiful, because I would be walking in His will and along the shoreline! His ways are always beautiful. I don't have an answer to "which way" to go yet, but in the secret place, He is speaking, and leading, and guiding, and healing my broken heart. I want to follow Him wherever He leads, with abandon, without compromise, with confidence! I know that means looking different than the world, and I am ready. Higher UP, Lord and further IN to Your mighty, awesome, manifest Presence!

"Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."" ~Isaiah 30:21,22

Tribute to my Mom!

2009-04-13T19:51:00.000-07:00

Today is my mother's birthday and I just wanted to post a couple things that I am thankful for about her that have helped to shape who I am as a woman.

I had a wonderful childhood and learned so much from my mom about how I wanted to be when I grew up. She is an amazing cook, which inspires me. She is one of the most creative people I know, which I have always wanted to emulate. She is an artist, which I wish I could be! (drawings, sketches, paintings). She can clean a house like nobody's business, which is why I am so meticulus at getting every nook and cranny. She is organized, which I have taken after to the point of near OCD - I love compartments! And she is a gift giver, which I have taken upon myself to love people in the same way!

She spent so much time teaching me things about being a woman, about life, and about the practical things of life. I'd like to think I would make a great wife and mother some day because I've had such an amazing example.

Christmases were amazing with all the planning and preparation that my parents put into the event.....and Easter was my favorite because of the weather, the season, the songs at church, the coloring of eggs, and the baskets, oh the baskets.....my mom put together the most wonderful baskets....they were so cherished....she always remembered our very favorite candy and just put so much effort into making them special!

Then there was Halloween...we carved pumpkins and gave out candy, but my mom made some amazing costumes from scratch for us! There was an elephant, a clown, and here's the infamous bunny costume! What fun we had!

I studied my mom's cooking and to this day still consult her about various recipes.....everything she makes tastes amazing and I always love visiting home and having her make me wonderful breakfasts in the morning....thanks mom!

The stories she told of her childhood would always intrigue me...the horses, the farm, 5 brothers and a sister, cows, etc.....here is my favorite picture from her youth:

My mom made childhood fun. And now she makes adulthood fun! She spoils her grandchildren and tells them vibrant and colorful stories. She plays richly with them and gives them so much of her time. I'm so glad that they will know so much of her that I know and remember from my upbringing!

She is amazing, wonderful, emulated, inspiring, teaching, and loved! She is a writer, storyteller, artist, creator, chef, mother, grandmother, confidant, dream-pursuer, and friend. She is the reason that I am so much of who I am today.

And now she is a graduate and a nurse! I'm so proud of you mom!

I hope to be a mom someday. And I want to be just like mine! I love you mom! Happy birthday!

Love your daughter,
Kristen Beth

Wrecked and Restored - thoughts during holy week!

2009-04-07T20:01:00.000-07:00

The Lord has been teaching me about humility these days! As my pastor says: "I wanna learn to walk with my face to the carpet..."

It's never an easy lesson....in fact it's messy and involves much self-reflection, evaluation, severe struggle, and always repentence. But it carries with it freedom, grace, mercy, and extreme love and is coupled with trust, obedience, and surrender.

The moment I realized I was acting within my own strength and outside of God's will (which I'll admit, took a while for me to see clearly - scary!), I was filled with an urgency to "get right" with God like never before! Conviction came when I decided that I didn't want to settle for being "in the middle" of darkness and light, of wrong and right, or of who I was and who He's making me. I don't want to be "in the middle" of the altar and the door, the safety of the boat and the crashing waves, His will and my plans, my faith and my hands......I only want to be in the middle of His PRESENCE!

I've tasted and seen that the LORD IS GOOD! I've been to the mountaintop! I've feasted at the table! I've seen the land of milk and honey! I know that there is abundant life! I will not compromise or settle for the middle, for less than His best, for anything other than His dreams for my life! I trust that they are better than ANYTHING I can ever think of or imagine!

The road here was not easy and I am not proud of things I've done in straying from my Savior. It is so true of the ancient hymn that we are "prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love..."

Praise God that we can come to Him and beg: "Here's my heart Lord, take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above!"

So, during this holy week of reflection on the cross, the crucifixion, the death of our Savior for our wretchedness......He has shown me things that He wants me to "die" to.....to put to death in me....to crucify in my old nature....

But He doesn't ask me to STAY there.....in the death of things.....He offers LIFE.....a resurrected life of abundance! We can identify with the crucifixion so that we can live in amazement of the resurrection! What a mighty God we serve!

In the past 10 days, the Lord has wrecked and restored me.....and the process is ongoing! It's a daily wrecking sometimes.....but I have to suffer through it so that He may receive the glory on the other side! So that I may boast in His restoration of my brokenness. So that in humilty I can know the strength and POWER of His unfailing and everlasting LOVE!

Be willing to let God do ANYTHING that He needs to do in you so that He can do EVERYTHING He wants to do through you! I guarantee it's always worth it! There's a harvest to be gathered.....the workers are few! Prepare yourself for MORE of God this week before Easter. Be ready for His wrecking and restoring....to God be the glory!

Here is a song that has resonated in me today....it's called "Have Your Way" by Andrew Peterson. It's off his latest album called "Resurrection Letters Vol. II"!
The lyrics are such a beautiful prayer of surrender and humilty!

Have Your Way

Father, hear me now when I am humbled
I fear that I will soon forget
Now I have no stength to stand and stumble
I have no wish to leave You yet
Oh Holy Father, hear me now
When flesh is strong and spirit weak
Please break my back when I won't bow
Won't You have Your way with me

Father, hear me now when I am humbled
When I am bent with holy shame
All the lies that I believed have crumbled
The blood of Christ my only plea
I cannot trust my own designs
My heart is prone to disobey
So listen Lord while there is time
Chain me fast if I won't stay
Take my life and have Your way

Please hear me Lord this blessed hour
When sin has loosed it's hold on me
Thy mercy is a mighty tower
So why should I not trust in Thee
Father have Your way with me

An Arrow Pointing Toward Heaven

2009-02-24T16:23:00.000-08:00

My dear friend, and saint, Ivar Overgaard, went home to be with the Lord this morning. My initial shock was heart-stabbing and grief. My next thought was peace and elation that He can know the Lord fully now, there is no dim glass to look through to see the Shikinah glory of our Maker! What fun, to dance before the throne of the Most High!

Ivar was key to my first overseas visit to Norway. He made sure that I saw the amazing sights of the Norway mountains and fjords, and that I tasted the foods of the best of Norway culture. He wound around dangerous roads as we passed through mountains and stopped EVERY time we asked to get out to roam and take pictures. He was the pastor of a local church and an amazing husband, father, and grandfather.

His spirit was gentle and kindred. He spent countless hours translating everything to us in English that the Norwegians were saying, and then translating to the Norwegians what we had to say. By week's end, his mind was exhausted and he was thinking in two languages! We had a good laugh over it!

I just recently had the pleasure of spending a second weekend at the "college of prayer" here in Atlanta, where Ivar and his wife, Kari, traveled the distance to be here. I had the pleasure of praying exclusively with them and of imparting them off on the journey home with annointing and power. We had an amazing weekend reminicing of the Norwary experience and it was such a blessing to create more memories together.

Ivar made a tremendous impact on my life and I will never forget his kindness and goodness. He went easily in his sleep. I can only think that maybe the Lord was jealous for him to come Home. But I thank God for the legacy he left with us of such a powerful example of a man after God's own heart. He will be missed. I will cry. And then I will try my grandest to follow in his example and be another "arrow pointing toward heaven!"

Goodbye my friend, goodbye.

How He Loves Us!

2009-01-20T20:18:00.000-08:00

This video is amazing and the song is powerful! Enjoy! And wait until the end......it's worth it!

How He Loves Us - Kim Walker

He is jealous for me
Love's like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
and I realize just how beautiful You are and how great your affections are for me.
Oh, how He loves us so
Oh, how He loves us
How He loves us so.

So we are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If grace is an ocean we're all sinking
So heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss and my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way

That he loves us,
Woah, how He loves us
Woah, how He loves us
Woah, how He loves

New Year, New Me!

2009-01-01T17:22:00.001-08:00

I have high hopes and expectations for this year! I expect to fall. I expect to fail. I expect to love. I expect to lose. I expect to grow, change, and learn. I expect God to continue to crucify my old nature. I expect Resurrection! I expect suffering. I expect abundant life! I expect the kingdom to advance and I expect the Lord to give me work to do. I expect tears and I expect joy!

I expect to blog more, complain less, visit more, pray more, love more...eat less, excercise more, listen more, talk less, dance more, stumble less, sing more. I expect to capture many new sunsets, travel, enjoy God's creation, and bless others. I expect to testify, witness, boast in Christ, devour His word, and enjoy His Presence! I expect to surrender and I expect to walk in freedom!

In lieu of resolutions (which I have, but are typically the same each year - get in shape, grow closer to God, and get out of debt)....here are the lyrics to 2 songs that sum up my heart's desire for 2009! Both of them I heard over Christmas. The first is a Vineyard song that my sister Laura re-introduced me to, and the second is a song I heard at the Vineyard Church in Ann Arbor during worship. It's by Jared Anderson. Hope you enjoy - both are on itunes and I highly recommend them! If you read through the lyrics of Ready Now, read all of the repeated lines and ask yourself: Are you ready now?.....for God to do what He wills?

Invitation Fountain- Vineyard Music

All who are weak
All who are weary
Come to the rock
Come to the fountain
All who have sailed
On the rivers of heartache
Come to the sea
Come on be set free

If You lead me Lord I will follow
Where You lead me Lord I will go
Come and heal me Lord I will follow
Where You lead me Lord I will go
I will go, I will go

Ready Now - Jared Anderson

You come like you promised you would
I want to surrender for good
I know that i need you
And i dont want to keep living life alone

So take my heart
and make it new
make it true
And make it like you
Take my hands
I lift them high
They're yours not mine to do
Do what you will
Do what you will
Do what you will

I feel like a blind man in you sight
I know that im wicked in your eyes
So wash me and make me shine like the sun
I want to tell everyone
that you're the only one

So take my heart
And make it new
Make it true
And make it like you
Take my hands
I lift them high
They're yours not mine to do
Do what you will
Do what you will
Do what you will

Im ready now
Im ready now
Im ready now
Do what you will
Im ready now
Im ready now
Im ready now
Im ready now
Im ready now
Im ready now
Do what you will
Im ready now
Im ready now
Im ready now

facedown

2008-10-28T19:52:00.001-07:00

I read a recent blog from a friend of mine talking about a Beth Moore bible study she is doing. One of the disciplines that Beth Moore is asking them to do during this study is to actually get down on their faces to pray in their group meeting time. The host of the bible study thought her carpets were too dirty to actually try this right away, so she rented a steam cleaner from Giant Eagle and she and her husband scrubbed their carpets.

Think about all the times you pray and what your posture is during that prayer time.....I tend to pray while driving, laying in bed (often falling asleep), in the shower, doing dishes, lying on the couch. What kind of difference would it make to actually put my face to the carpet as an act of reverence to God and get uncomfortable so that I can focus completely on Him. It sounds revolutionary and humbling and an obvious statement of the seriousness of my petitions.

In this day and age, and hard time, we need to be serious about our prayers!

I'm going to try it and I'll let you know how it goes....any of you who try this, please let me know your thoughts and experiences! Honor God with your posture and receive the blessing of His presence when you find that He meets you facedown!

Matt Redman wrote a great song and a book about it. Here are the lyrics:

Welcomed in to the courts of the king,
I've been ushered into your presence.
Lord, I stand on your merciful gound,
Yet with every step tread with reverence.

There is none in heavens like you,,
And upon the earth, who's your equal?
You are far above, You're the highest of heights,
And i'm bowing down to exalt you.

And I'll fall facedown,
As Your glory shines around.
Yes i'll fall facedown,
As your glory shines around.

Let your glory shine around,
Let you glory shine around.
King of glory here be found,
King of glory.

October Summer

2008-10-13T19:18:00.000-07:00

I just got back from Florida this past weekend and I feel so refreshed. I went to help start a College of Prayer campus (www.collegeofprayer.org) in a little town called Dunnellon, near Gainesville.

I arrived on Thursday afternoon and attended a 2 day time of prayer, teaching, worship, and fellowship for local leaders and pastors. I came ready to serve and excited to see what God had in store. I was able to share a couple of testimonies of freedom that opened up a doorway for many others to experience deliverance. I was able to bless the worship leader by helping with music during the communion time. I was able to spend sweet time in the Presence of the Living God with the body of Christ.

I left broken, changed, poured out, filled up, and restored.

I continued my weekend by finding a nearby island community on the Gulf of Mexico called Cedar Key. It was quite the small town, not a movie theater within 60 miles. I checked into a cottage and after realizing that my wireless wouldn't work and my cell phone was roaming, I felt disconnected to everyone, which was OK because I still felt totally connected to God!

It was a relief and ever so restful. I relaxed in my little cottage and flung wide the french doors so that I could hear the ocean water ebb and flow against the rocks, right outside my door. By the time I went to bed, the tide had reached my balcony's edge. I could hear the music from the nearby pub as people sang out their intoxication and toasted to the good times they wouldn't remember in the morning.

I woke up the next day and went for a beautiful, brisk walk along the shoreline of the Gulf. I watched as people began casting their fishing poles, planting themselves on rocks and docks, hoping for an exciting pull at the other end of their line. The anticipation, the waiting - to experience a few moments of elation. What patience and determination fisherman have.

As I kept walking, I saw a couple of butterflies dance and play with each other in the air. For a moment, I was captivated, and then.....I started noticing they were everywhere! On every flower, plant, tree, or bush there were literally dozens of butterflies. I started trying to capture them on camera, and as I thought about their beauty and their meaning of new life, my eyes welled up and my spirit soared, and I knew God loved me deep! I realized that the butterflies had been there on my first time around the block, but I hadn't noticed them. As soon as I SAW, they were everywhere. I thought about God's Presence and how it's always there and available, but we just don't always notice it or receive!

The wind from the day and the morning and the ocean was warm upon my face. I realized it was October and it still felt like summer. I knew it was cooling off in Georgia, but it was nice to have one more taste of summer.

The night before I spent my time chasing a sunset (one of my favorite past times) until I could find a clear view and watch it change in all of it's colors and glory.
I felt so much peace this weekend - a peace that truly did pass my understanding. I felt truly content, truly free, truly alive, and 100% satisfied in Jesus Christ, my Savior! It was like nothing I'd ever known. This was "resting" in Christ!

Praise God for His indescribable gifts!

Resurrection Letters, Vol. II

2008-09-08T19:25:00.000-07:00

Andrew Peterson's long-awaited album is due out soon and I am going to see him in concert for the second time this year on Saturday.....

I found a place online where they play tracks from his new album before it's released and I've been soaking it up.....I can't wait to have the real thing!

At the concert in March, I learned that "Hosanna" means SAVE US! I blogged about it, I think, and how that meaning has changed my storybook picture of Jesus riding on a donkey into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday......

Here is an excerpt from his blog that he wrote back in Oct. 2007 while still creating the album that posts the lyrics to one of the most rich and powerful songs on the album: Hosanna!

Somebody said that you have to preach the gospel to yourself daily. I hope this album will help people to do just that: to remind themselves of the gravity of their sin and the glory of God's mercy, of the promise that Death is nothing to fear, that resurrection is a worthy hope.

Hosanna

I am tangled up in contradiction
I am strangled by my own two hands
I am hunted by the hounds of addiction
Hosanna

I have lied to everyone who trusts me
I have tried to fall when I could stand
I have only loved the ones who love me
Hosanna

Oh, Hosanna
See the long awaited king
Come to set his people free
Oh, Hosanna
Come and tear the temple down
Raise it up on holy ground
Hosanna

I have struggled to remove this raiment
Tried to hide every shimmering strand
I contend with these ghosts and these hosts of bright angels
Hosanna
I have cursed the man that you have made me
I have nursed the beast that bays for my blood
I have run from the one who would save me
Hosanna

Oh, Hosanna
See the long awaited king
Come to set his people free
Oh, Hosanna
Come and tear the temple down
Raise it up on holy ground
Hosanna

We cry for blood
We take your life
Hosanna
We cry for blood
We take your life
It is blood and it is life that you have given

You have crushed beneath your heel the vile serpent
You have carried to the grave the black stain
You have torn apart the temple's holy curtain
You have beaten death at death's own game

Hosanna
Hail the long awaited king
Come to set his people free
(We cry) Oh, Hosanna
Come and tear this temple down
Raise it up on holy ground
Oh, Hosanna
I will lift my voice and sing
You have come and washed me clean
Hosanna

Jumping and Hugging

2008-09-06T19:56:00.000-07:00

I was laying by the pool today drifting in and out of conscienceness, when I heard a kid in the pool talking to his friend. "I wish the whole ground was a trampoline", he said. "Then I would just jump everywhere!". I thought, what a neat idea......and one that at my age I just wouldn't think to think! I wish the earth was a trampoline too! I wanna jump everywhere! And then I realized how much I need to get back to the "fun" in life.....

I was at work the other day, and as I walked a child out to their parent, I witnessed a two-year-old walk boldly up to an unknown two-year-old, arms out-stretched, and almost pummeled the other over with a HUG! The receiving child just stood there, not knowing quite what to make of this gesture, but not avoiding it either. And I thought, it's too bad we can't just walk up to complete strangers and hug them without any reason, pretense, or even introduction.

"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3

"The humility of children is disarming, isn't it? There is no pride or prejudice. There are no inhibitions or hidden agendas. Undiluted humility. There is an Eden-like innocence that children possess that all of us crave."
- Mark Batterson from In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day

Wouldn't the world be a more fun and loving place if we did more jumping and hugging? Wouldn't our faith be less shaken if we got back to our child-like hearts! We've much to learn from the young ones........much to learn.

*dedicated to the young ones in my life that are so precious: Lindsey, Jacob, Sophia, Calvin, Stephen, Alex, Heidi, Caroline, Chloe, Hok'sila, Connor, etc...and to all the new lives that are just entering or about to enter this crazy world!

Belated Birthday Blessings

2008-08-05T19:44:00.000-07:00

My sister's birthday was last Sunday.....I called her, but I wanted to do more.....since she is the most faithful reader of this blog, I will pay tribute to Laura Jean, who is also one of my bestest friends!

She is someone I can tell anything to, someone whom I laugh with regularly, and talk to so often even though miles separate us......I can see her just a few times per year and feel like no time has passed.....she gets me, she knows me, and she loves me anyway.....She is quite different from me, but that just makes the relationship stronger as we learn how to embrace one another despite them.....

She loves the Lord and it has been a blessing to be sisters in flesh and sisters in spirit......She is leaving for Ethiopia on Friday 8/8/08 (same day as the Olympics start!) and I am so excited for her trip......This is her second mission trip there, and I would ask anyone who reads this to please join me in lifting her up and covering her with prayer.....she will be there for 10 days!

I pray that her experiences would be different than the last trip, that they would challenge and change her and draw her even closer to her Saviour....I pray that the light of Christ in her would affect and radiate onto others and that she would make the most of every opportunity to share the gospel......I pray that God would go before the team and prepare the hearts to receive the message of the good news of Christ Jesus.......I pray for traveling mercies and safety, for an abundance of love, for a showering of peace, and for an outpouring of the Holy Spirit to annoint the team of faithful and devoted laborers.....I pray that she would stand firm in fullness of Christ, suited in the armor of God.....

"Declare His glory among the nations, His marvelous deeds among all peoples." Psalm 96:3

Laura - "The Lord will guide you always; He will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail." Isaiah 58:11

"Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!'"

Thank you for your obedience to Christ to "go and make disciples in all nations".....God bless you and fill you with His Presence and Spirit.....I love you Laura....Happy Belated Birthday! You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Your sister, Kristen

Worship

2008-07-21T18:02:00.000-07:00

I want these lyrics to be my heartcry to the Lord every day!

I want to live for you
I want to die to me
I want to be emptied
I want to be freed
From all that holds me captive
All that holds me down
All that's tried to lose me
Now that I've been found
I want to live for you

*from "Live for You" by Connersvine

Jesus, be the One I live for....have Your way in me....make this prayer ring true....help me to let go of the things I grasp too tightly...Lord, change my mind, shape my heart, and mold my spirit.....for the glory of Your name!

Remembering Dads

2008-06-15T16:31:00.000-07:00

Today is Father's Day and I thought it only appropriate to post a tribute to my dad....and then I found the first picture of my dad with his dad (my grandpa) and my brother, Jeff, and I thought it was a great generation picture! I know that my father had such a great father, and in turn, he has been the most excellent dad a girl could ask for.

Sure, as a teenager, I thought he was always wrong and never understood me, but what kid doesn't go through that. As an adult, I've grown to respect my dad so much for the values, beliefs, and strengths he instilled in me since childhood.

I'll never forget singing around the dinner table with my dad playing guitar to praise songs. Today, I play guitar and sing praise songs at church, and I thank him for the inspiration. On a few occasions, in the past couple of years, we've had the opportunity to play guitar together in the living room, and I've cherished those memories.

My dad has always loved fishing, boating, even making a canoe with his own hands, carpentry, gardening, tennis, football games, crabbing, and golf. Not every kid gets to learn how to catch crabs and then cook them up and eat them at the beach. And I know that some of my creativity in making things comes from my father, but I do have to give some credit to mom (sorry, dad!)......Appreciation for the outdoors, camping, and fishing, I love because of my dad. Not to mention BLT's with fresh garden tomatoes, corn on the cob, and open face liverwurst sandwiches on rye (from grandpa!)......

So, on this day of remembering dads, I am so honored that I can claim such an amazing earthly father. I can only give thanks and praise to my heavenly Father for such a blessing as this.

My dad has been such a great example of providence, kindness, discipline (because he loves us), humility, intelligence (wisdom), strength, love, patience, and generosity. He has loved me even when I've been unlovable. He has given, even though he knows that he may not receive. He has sacrificed, worked hard, and had so many amazing achievements both in his family life and in business. He has instilled in me a hard work ethic and a desire to do my best in all things. I respect, admire, and have always looked up to him so much!

Today, I get such a thrill out of watching him with all 5 of his grandchildren. I'm so glad they get to be so close to him and learn from him. The bottom picture is him playing guitar with the oldest, Lindsey (now 6 years old!). Maybe she'll be inspired to play too someday....she is already a great singer!

I know that my dad will always be there for all of us and that he will do anything to prevent us from hurting. He has always protected the ones he loves....

Lord, bless my father today......give him rest, joy, and peace.....continue to grow him up in wisdom and truth and rejoice over him with singing. Shower him with blessings and overwhelm him with Your unfailing love. Protect him and keep him safe. For the glory of Your name!

Thank you dad for being you.....and thank you God for making my dad!

Happy Father's Day Dad! I love you so much and wish I wasn't so far away!

Kristen Beth

Bread and Wine

2008-06-01T11:46:00.000-07:00

Today during communion, I was struck by these song lyrics from "How Deep the Father's Love For Us":

Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice,
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

I identified quickly with the crucifixion this morning, and rejoiced in the resurrection.......not only of Jesus Christ, but of this wretched sinner that He raised from the dead as well.......

Therefore, I have no reason to be discouraged, no reason to be downcast...no reason not to worship the Living God who gives all good things to those who love Him......

I admit that I have been discouraged lately, and I confess that here and openly recognize it, refuse it, and replace it with HOPE!! May the words of MY mouth and the meditations of MY soul, be pleasing to the Lord! He is the God of ALL comfort and encouragement!!

This morning I remembered Christ through the sacrament of communion......and I asked Him to forgive my troubled heart and move me higher up, further in, and deeper still.....for the glory of His name!

Ponderings From an Older Mind

2008-05-28T20:04:00.000-07:00

So, this birthday has felt heavier than most....I've had a roller coaster of emotions in regards to life, creation, age, weight, love lost, and evaluation of my present and current circumstances....and it all comes back to this: I'm 36, single, and satisfied in my Savior (although I don't often live like it!)

Tonight in a prayer meeting we talked of being "anchored in Love".....as I thought about this, the Lord reminded me that to be "anchored in Love" is to be anchored in the gospel, which is to be anchored and rooted in Christ, which is to be connected to God by the power of the Holy Spirit.....because ultimately, God is love and God is perfect....and "perfect love drives out fear" 1 John 4:18......it all comes full circle.....

So, I won't be afraid of loving God more, loving others more boldly, loving myself, and receiving love from Christ Himself and through others......I pray this for each of you as well......be anchored and rooted in love in all you say, think, and do.......it's never easy, but we are called to things such as this....and without love, we are truly nothing but a "clanging gong"!

As I was driving home, the song "I Am" came on my ipod by Nichole Nordeman and these words moved me to tears (as they usually do):

Pencil marks on a wall
I wasn't always this tall,
You scattered some monsters from beneath my bed,
You watched my team win,
You watched my team lose,
You watched when my bicycle went down again,

And When I was weak unable to speak,
still I could call You by name,
and I said “Elbow healer, Superhero,
come if You can,” and You said “I Am”

Only 16, life is so mean, what kind of curfew is at ten PM
You saw my mistakes, You watched my heart break
Heard when I swore I’d never love again

When I was weak, unable to speak,
still I could call You by name,
and I said “Heart-ache Healer, Secret-keeper,
be my Best Friend” and You said “I Am”

When I am weak, unable to speak,
still I will call You by name.
“Oh Shepherd, Savior, Pasture-maker,
hold on to my hand,” and You say “I Am.”

The winds of change,
And circumstance blow in and all around
us so we find a foothold that’s familiar,
And bless the moments that we feel You nearer

Life had begun, I was woven and spun,
You let the angels dance around the throne, who can say when,
But they’ll dance again, when I am free and finally headed home

I will be weak, unable to speak,
still I will call You by name
“Creator, Maker, Life-sustainer,
Comforter, Healer, My Redeemer,
Lord and King, Beginning and
the End, I Am, yes, I Am.”

*He is everything to me and I pray that this coming year I will start to truly live and act like it......blessings to all of you who bless me with your friendship and unyielding love! Cheers to another year of worshipping and serving our great and awesome God!

**the above pictures are two of my childhood birthdays (always memorable with many "bunny" cakes - thanks mom!) and the birth announcement that my mom made when I was born and my dad was still in college working on his PhD! Good times!

It's Never Too Late!

2008-04-30T19:30:00.000-07:00

I'm so proud of my mom! I flew home this weekend to attend the graduation ceremony of my mother from Eastern Michigan University.

She gradutated at the age of 65 from nursing school after many years of intensive and vigorous studying of sciences and the human body. She gradutated with honors, magna cum laude! She graduated proudly and with 15 family members there to cheer her on, including 4 of her children and 6 of her grandchildren. She walked across the stage in her black cap and gown, and thanked her friends, family, and faculty for standing by her during her pursuit of collegiate achievement.

It brought tears of joy to my eyes to think about how excited she must be to have this day finally come and to be able to celebrate with the people that love her most. It reminded me that it's never too late to do anything, if you set your mind to it and never give up on your dreams. I never thought that she needed to go to school to prove herself to anyone. Her acheivements in life have been grand thus far, but she did it and I applaud and support her! Thanks mom, you are truly an inspiration and I am honored and be your daughter!

My mom gradutated from college this weekend at the age of 65.....I wouldn't have missed it for the world!

Cheers!

The Problem with Planes

2008-04-19T15:25:00.000-07:00

….is that they wait until a flight of a hundred people are comfortably settled and ready for departure before discovering that a flight instrument is broken…..

*Can we please just rev her up for 5 minutes before boarding and inevitably deplaning and inconveniencing tons of weary (and anxious) travelers?

…..the “recline” button is such a tease…..ready? push…..ahhh, yes, 2 inches, I feel so much more relaxed and reclined for that matter!

…..recycled “human-scented” air coming out of vents that either blast or trickle….

….lifting heavy carry-ons over my head into “convenient” overhead compartments which are unaccessible after departure (Ok, so maybe that’s a problem with my packing, but I’ll blame the plane for now!)

...magazine pockets in front of you that don't hold bottled water well!

...no leg room, unless you're in an exit row, in which you MUST know and be willing to assist in the event of a crash or emergency - we all say we will in order to get the "roomy" seat!

..."U-shaped" neck pillows to increase our ability to sleep sitting up in the most uncomfortable position!

...meals on the international flight that are described as "chicken parts with a glob of brown goo on it"....mmmm, yummy, pass the salt and pepper please!

....lines to get on, lines to get off, lines to be searched, delays, lost luggage, minimal compensation...need I go on!

Thank God that He is never late! His timing is perfect, there is plenty of "room" to stretch our legs and rest in Him, His aroma is sweet, His burden is light, there are no lines, and we can taste and see that He is good.....

p.s. I have to say that I really did love the individual movie screens on my first international flight.....they were so cute and useful! Well done KLM Airbus!

Cheers!

Norway Bound

2008-04-07T17:46:00.000-07:00

Wow, so in one week I'll be taking my first "overseas" adventure, starting with a long, all night plane ride. It's starting to become real to me that I am actually going. I'm beginning to get excited and nervous. I'll be travelling alone, so I'm a little nervous. But I can't wait to see the Norwegian countryside. I'm really looking forward to the College of Prayer (www.collegeofprayer.org) and joining my pastor and his wife in ministry.

"The College of Prayer is a ministry of the Revival Prayer Institute, Inc. established to mentor Christian leaders who will reach a lost world through a revived church. We are a faith ministry organized exclusively for the purpose of mentoring and encouraging pastors, wives, Christian leaders, missionaries, intercessors - all who desire to more effectively impact their world through fervent revival prayer, prayer evangelism, intercession, and worship. "

I am honored to have a chance to be a part of this.....as I understand it, my role on the Norway trip will be to be available to pray with women during extended prayer and worship times, to listen to God on their behalf, and possibly a chance to participate in worship through singing and playing guitar......

I know this is not a normal "missionary trip" as it is mostly Christian workers, pastors, and leaders who attend these conferences for the purpose of revival and refreshment with the Lord......I am humbled to be able to pray and minister to them.....it excites me that there are people who care so much for God's children and His sheep that they would come just to be renewed so that they can keep standing firm in praying for the lost and encouraging the saved.......I think it is so important to equip the equippers......we all need to be filled and refreshed so that we can continue to harvest the ripened field and participate in the building of God's kingdom here on earth......

These are the prayers of my heart as I prepare my heart, will, and mind:

-for the eyes of my heart to be enlightened so that I might be used in the lives of these people
-for safe travels and against fear of the unknown (foreign country)
-for God to search me and know my heart, to convict me to repentence so that I might be readily available to others in their needs
-for opportunities to minister and speak truth and His word to the hurting and the broken
-that I might be changed through this experience to have a deeper relationship with Christ
-that I may confidently hide His word in my heart (memorization is hard for me)
-for my pastor and his wife as they prepare to teach at the conference
-for the annointing of the Holy Spirit and the manifest presence of God to transform hearts, minds, and wills
-that I would be free to intercede for others without fear
-for boldness!

Thank you so much for reading this......thank you to each of you who have been instrumental in my spiritual upbringing......thank you for bearing my burdens, thank you for raising me in truth, thank you for speaking to me in love, thank you for lifting me up in prayer.......thank you for being my brothers, sisters, father, mother, friends, and confidants....I know that God will prepare me and use me to the glory of His name! Thanks for walking this journey with me......

May Christ bless each of you richly according to His great and unfailing love!

Ha Det Bra (Goodbye, take care of yourself)

Sisters (or: you mess with her, you mess with me me!)

2008-03-29T06:25:00.000-07:00

"My sister and me, treasurers of each other's childhoods, linked by volatile love, best friends who make other best friends ever so slightly less best." Patricia Volk

"You and I are tied together by years of misunderstandings, cross words, icy silences, laughter, hugs, tenderness, and love. All of those strands are twisted into a knot that nothing will ever, ever break." Ellyn Sanna

"It's hard to be responsible, adult, and sensible all the time. How good it is to have a sister whose heart is as young as your own." Pam Brown

"I find that as I grow older, I love those most whom I loved first." Thomas Jefferson

"The bond that joined us lay deeper than outward things; the rivers of our souls spring from the same well!" Po Chu-l

"So many shared memories rest between sisters. Some, like a sleeping grizzly bear, seem best left undisturbed. While others can fill a rainy afternoon with laughter and sunshine." Melody Carlson

"Today is far from Childhood - but up and down the hills I held her hand the tighter - which shortened all the miles..." Emily Dickinson

"You mess with her, you mess with me!" Maria Smedstad

"Sisters are....a port in each other's storms." Elizabeth Fishel

"Help one another, is part of the religion of our sisterhood." Louisa May Alcott

"Sisters....help each other stay in good relationships, get out of messed up ones, pick up and start over again." Linda H. Hollies

"The only time you look down on me is when you're picking me up from the floor." Maria Smedsted

"A sister is one who will pick you up when you are down. If she cannot pick you up she will lie down beside you and listen." Unknown

"If you don't understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child." Linda Sunshine

"One day you are wanting to rearrange her personality ever so slightly.....but the bottom line is this: you will always love her, no matter what. Unconditionally." Whitney Otto

"However frank you might think you're being with friends, honesty reaches a different level between sisters." Sandra Deeble

"If your sister is in a tearing hurry to go out and cannot catch your eye, she's probably wearing your best sweater." Pam Brown

"We were threads of the same cloth...when blended together it turned into the most beautiful of fabrics." Diane Burke

"Sisters are like different instruments in a band, or different voices in a chorus, because you are not exactly alike, you harmonize in beautiful ways." Margaret Lannamann

"A sister is like a mirror in which you can see a part of yourself reflected." Joan Walsh Anglund

"Our siblings resemble us just enough to make all their differences confusing." Susan Scarf Merrell

*for Laura and Deborah whom I've known their entire lives.....you are each so precious to me and I thank God for you daily....what would I ever do without you!

*for Michelle who has been added to our "sisterhood" by marriage.....we love you the same - unconditionally.....we are proud to be the sisters you never had....happy birthday!

*to my friends along this path of life that know me well and love me even though you know me......we are sisters by the thread of Christ and family in His church: Kim Howard, Meg, Julie, Charissa, Carol Grubbs, Carol White, Larissa, Aubrey, Kim DeGuido, Jenn, Dana, Sherry, Sarah Mark, and Jessica!

*to my girls at work whom I spend countless hours with, toiling side by side and day by day - thanks for putting up with me and making my job and coming to work a joy and pleasure: Mary Ellen, Denise, Katherine, Catherine, and Bridgette!

I would never have made it this far in life without all my girls! Thanks for your love and faithfulness! Sorry if I forgot anyone!

Swan Lake and Meeting AP

2008-03-25T19:02:00.000-07:00

What a great weekend! My friend, Larissa, invited me to "get away" for a day before Easter. We left on Good Friday and drove to the Georgia mountains to a quaint Bed and Breakfast owned by a very hospitible Christian couple. We had a wonderful time of being catered with scrumptious food, playing backgammon, worshipping with voices and guitars by a fire that never quite got going (but not for lack of trying, mind you!), Larissa falling in the muddy lake, beautiful weather, and excellent and much needed quiet time in amazing surroundings and in the presence of God.....we felt blessed and refreshed!

Then it was off on a road trip to Knoxville to see a performance by one of my favorite artists, Andrew Peterson. I've followed his songwriting, journals, concerts, blogs, Rabbit Room, and now bookwriting, for a long time. His songs have convicted my spirit as well as made my heart soar with praises. His blogs have brought me to tears as I relate to the way he is real about his shortcomings while at the same time, exalting the One who loves us most. I've been to a few of his concerts in the past and they have always been memorable. I've recommended his music to tons of people and have gifted his Christmas album to many: Behold the Lamb of God. Recently, I've followed the making of his latest album entitled: Resurrection Letters, Vol. 2.......

The concert was just him on the guitar and Ben Shive on the grand piano. He told background stories of songs I've loved, he talked comically in between songs, and he played new songs from the upcoming album. My favorite was a song called "Hosanna", which I learned means, "Save us!" It always seemed like the people crying "hosanna" were praising him, while instead they were shouting for salvation! What a difference that makes. Needless, to say, I cannot wait for the album to come out.

After the concert, at a smallish church in Knoxville, I decided to try to meet Andrew. Surprisingly, it was quite easy, and he was quite pleasant (although shorter than I had thought!). I told him that I had driven from Atlanta and that I felt that I already knew him from reading so much of his heart and thoughts online. I expressed my excitement for the Rabbit Room and told him how much his music and journals have meant to me over the years. I talked to Ben too, and told him how much I appreciated his hard work to bring together AP's albums. His piano playing is amazing! He's been working on his own album for 2 years now.

I bought AP's first book, released four days prior: On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness, and asked him to sign it. He wrote: Kristen, beware the toothy cows! AP

We drove home and got in late, but rose excited for the early sunrise Easter service at 7am outside. I felt so much joy on this Resurrection Day. So much life. So much peace in the presence of my Savior.

He's alive! He is risen! The tomb is empty! He was risen to rule, to rescue, to return, and to restore! Thank you Lord for an amazing and memorable weekend of showered blessings! Thank you for the gift of Your Son, Jesus Christ, for His death and resurrection. Thank you that you have allowed me to be a dwelling place for Your life and Spirit!

Thanks AP for sharing your gifts of music and words! Thanks Larissa, for your friendship and time!

Peace of the Risen Christ to all!

Words

2008-03-08T19:03:00.001-08:00

I read this poem recently and was overcome by the words and they way they move, and shape, and tingle on your tongue....still not sure what all it means.......reminds me of Dylan Thomas! Eugene Peterson took the title to one of his books from this sonnet: Christ Plays In Ten Thousand Places.....

“As kingfishers catch fire, dragonflies draw flame;
As tumbled over rim in roundy wells
Stones ring; like each tucked string tells, each hung bell’s
Bow swung finds tongue to fling out broad its name;
Each mortal thing does one thing and the same:
Deals out that being indoors each one dwells;
Selves — goes itself; _myself_ it speaks and spells,
Crying _What I do is me: for that I came_.

“I say more: the just man justices;
Keeps grace: that keeps all his goings graces;
Acts in God’s eye what in God’s eye he is –
Christ. For Christ plays in ten thousand places,
Lovely in limbs, and lovely in eyes not his
To the Father through the features of men’s faces.”

Sonnet by Gerard Manley Hopkins

I'll tell you how the sun set...a ribbon at a time!

2008-01-23T18:30:00.000-08:00

"I sometimes look into the endless heavens, the cosmos of which we can't find the edge, and ask God what it means. Did You really do all of this to dazzle us? Do You really keep it shifting, rolling round the pinions to stave off boredom? God forbid Your glory would be our distraction. And God forbid we would ignore Your glory."
excerpt from: Through Painted Deserts by Donald Miller

Let it Snow!!

2008-01-20T18:13:00.000-08:00

What is winter with no snow? Just cold.....what fun to see snow two times here in Hotlanta.....It came down in big, beautiful flakes and then hung around long enough for a village of snow people to be born and frolick on the lawns for a day!

OK, so the city shut down and flights were canceled or delayed, businesses lost some money, and ice scrapers had to be dug up and actually used, but it made me feel like a kid again....it made me long to be home in Michigan where we had the exact same big, flaky, beautiful, magical snow on New Year's Eve.......except the accumulation was 10 inches!

It was so great to see people outside building a snowman, kids that have never seen this "white wonder" stand in awe and then throw snowballs at each other......how can you have a decent childhood without ever throwing a snowball?

After the first snow last Wednesday, I woke up and found two snowballs in the freezer! Cute Aubrey, but you're still not gonna get me!!

Hope this winter you find magical moments and a deeper appreciation for our glorious creation and that you find the true JOY of the Creator of snow LIVING in you!

Divine Romance

2007-12-09T15:49:00.000-08:00

These lyrics have really moved me this Christmas season...if you don't know the song, get it from itunes, it's fantabulous!

Divine Romance - Phil Wickham

The fullness of Your grace is here with me
The richness of Your beauty’s all I see
The brightness of Your glory has arrived
In Your presence God, I’m completely satisfied

For You I sing I dance
Rejoice in this divine romance
Lift my heart and my hands
To show my love, to show my love

A deep deep flood, an Ocean flows from You
Of deep deep love, yeah it’s filling up the room
Your innocent blood, has washed my guilty life
In Your presence God I’m completely satisfied

Can I get an "amen"?

The Promise of Autumn

2007-11-29T16:34:00.000-08:00

I love the fall. It is by far my favorite season. I have always been overwhelmed by the brilliant colors. In fact, I often joke that if I happen to be driving at sunset in the fall, I could literally get into an accident from the breath-taking impact of the colors of both tree leaves and sky at the same time to my heart. And it's probably true.

I beleive the Lord romances me that way. I haven't always appreciated the beauty of creation as piercingly as I do now. I've always loved colors, but until I fell in love with Jesus, I never acknowledged the Master Artist behind the masterpiece of the night sky or the autumn leaves or the sunrise or sunset. He is so romantic.

When I moved to Charlotte, NC from Michigan, I had my first taste of a long, beautiful season of fall. The leaves didn't turn and then fall immediately, they lingered and I was captivated by His glorious majesty so often. I easily looked forward to the end of summer.

When I recently moved to Atlanta, GA, I was told that last year's fall here was not much and that the trees had turned quickly and gone bare without so much of a notice. At first, my heart sank...."No fall? This cannot be!"

And then I remembered my Savior. I responded with confidence, "I know my Lord and I know that it was His will that He brought me to this new place, and I know that He would not have moved me to a place where there was no fall......there will be colors!" Some thought that was bold of me to claim, others just didn't believe me at all. But I trusted and I waited and I looked and I SAW!

Recently, I had an opportunity to spend a weekend at Stone Mountain in Georgia, which is a beautful and huge state park. I wanted to get some quality reflection and listening time with the Lord. Guess what He showed me - COLORS! The mountain was filled with trees bearing the most brilliant leaves and the paths were covered in golds and reds and oranges and yellows. It was mid to upper 60's, so I walked and I prayed and I thanked God for the beauty of the earth and the glory that shone all around me. The sun gleamed brightly to enhance the view and the hues. It was an amazing weekend. And the colors are still here into December!

Thank you Lord, for loving me enough to show me your glory in the brightness of color, the peace of a river, and the magnificance of the sky!

"From the colors of fall to the fragrance of spring,
Every creature unique in the song that it sings...

Indescribable, uncontainable
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name
You are amazing God!
All powerful, untamable
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God!"

Elf Yourself

2007-11-19T17:21:00.000-08:00

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=9540253375

Click on the link above to get a good chuckle! If this doesn't put you in the Christmas spirit, I don't know what will........who needs Christmas cards, this says it all! Thanks Laura.....

The Rabbit Room

2007-11-12T17:26:00.000-08:00

In October, one of my favorite artists, Andrew Peterson, created this new website and I highly recommend it. Here'e the link: www.rabbitroom.com

It's set up as a blog so that readers can comment. Most of the contributers are singer/songwriters, pastors, and writers. All of them have an appreciation and passion for reading great books, listening to good music, and admiring tasteful and thought-provoking art. The room itself feels like a place of community and "kindred spirits".

The original "rabbit room" was in the back of an Oxford Pub where the likes of C.S. Lewis, J.R.R. Tolkien, Charles Williams, and other friends met to discuss the books they were writing.

Most of the reviews of each creative piece, be it book, album, or art, become quite lengthy and introspective as the artists share how these mediums touched their lives, challenged their spirits, and revealed to them truth and beauty in their walks with the Lord.

I strongly urge those of you who read a ton of literature and listen to a vast array of music to add this page to your favorites. Here is a snippet of the vision from the founder, Andrew Peterson:

I believe strongly in the value of the artists in this world. I believe that when someone who was made to strive to create beauty in the world is, as Brennan Manning said, “ambushed by Jesus,” the art that results bears a God-given power that draws men to Christ. I have encountered that power in the sub-creations of Christ-followers countless times. (I’ve also encountered it in the works of those who haven’t yet succumbed to the source of their gifting.) Those works of art have helped me to better understand the Bible and its author, they have given me the tools with which to worship, to serve, to revel in the greatness of the Maker.

Those works of art are the fruit of obedience to the artist’s calling. The burden God places on each of us is to become who we are meant to be. We are most fully ourselves when Christ most fully lives in us and through us; the mother shines brightest with her child in her arms, the father when he forgives his wandering son, and the artist when he or she is drawing attention to grace by showing the pinprick of light overcoming the darkness in the painting or the story or the song.

The world knows darkness. Christ came into the world to show us light. I have seen it, have been blinded by it, invaded by it, and I will tell its story. I cannot help but see that story everywhere I look. I see it when I am full of joy and weightless as a cloud, and I see it when grief and self-loathing root me to the cold earth; it is remembering the story, Christ whispering it in my ear, that kills the despair, sets me gently on the donkey, and takes me to an inn to recover from the wounds. How can I keep myself from singing?

The Rabbit Room is a place for stories. For artists who believe in the power of old tales, tales as old as the earth itself, who find hope in them and beauty in the shadows and in the light and in the source of the light
Andrew Peterson (The Proprietor)

Here is where I've discovered a new found joy in reading and explored books I would have never picked up. Here, I first heard an amazing review of Sara Groves new album "Tell Me What You Know", which I wholeheartedly recommend and have been listening to almost nonstop since I purchased it on itunes!

I'll leave the rest for you to discover, but I can think of so many of you that are "kindred spirits" to me that would truly benefit and be blessed, inspired, and challenged for visiting this room regularly......ENJOY!

Thanks Andrew Peterson.....

Tribute to a Brother

2007-11-09T19:55:00.000-08:00

Parting Thoughts - Frank Grubbs

"My feet have found faith, beneath your table...
they have found rest in your backyard.
My hands have toiled beside you, but the work was easy...
cause He came down and the yoke was shared.

And I will miss you,
and I will pray,
that faith goes before you,
and peace follows near.

My eyes have seen the love that grows within you....
and it's caused my hindsight to go blind.
My ears have heard the truth that you wrap in a blessing...
and though convicting, I am set free.

And the things that we have bound up,
are as far as the east from west.
And the things that we have given,
are worth their weight in gold.
And the love that we have shared,
is priceless and holy....
it is a treasure we have stored up in heaven.

And though the shape of the house may change....
Christ, He will reign there just the same.
And though the miles will lengthen, the same ground holds us both,
and the same good rain falls on us all.

And I will miss you,
and I will pray,
that grace goes before you,
and peace follows near."

I miss you friend....and this song represents so many other seasons of kindred spirits that have come and gone in my life....Praise God that HE is steadfast and unchanging!

Such beautiful lyrics of the experience of community....write on, brother...sing your heart out!

Community Living

2007-11-07T18:11:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking a lot about community lately, since a recent visit to Charlotte, NC. I've always been drawn to community. I was raised in an environment of people that called themselves the "community". I have lived to experience and taste true community and sadly witnessed false community as well.

To me, living in community is like the representation of the biblical, early church described in Acts 2:42. The component I believe we, as humans, trying to be better than we are, often miss is real transparency (for lack of a better word), vulnerability, and humility. So often we try to create groups of believers that get together to see who is wearing the nicest suit of fig leaves. We compare ourselves by who has it most together, who knows the most scripture, or who has sinned the least lately. We continue to try to modify our behavior, instead of letting the Divine Healer modify our hearts.

My point is this: all the behavior modification in the world will never change our hearts (I think Derek Webb says this in "The House Show" - excellent album). Jesus however, will change our hearts. Until we are willing to surrender, submit, and relinguish ALL control to the One who loves us most, only then, can we begin to experience true community with one another.

Then we can let another soul into our mess. Then we can truly testify and boast in our Savior. Then we can unwaveringly trust God's will and direction. Then we can more clearly hear His voice, even when it is a whisper. Then we can gloriously edify, love, sharpen, challenge, and correct one another in the body of Christ. Then we can boldy speak to one another truth in His love. Then we can joyfully serve each other and anticipate the needs of those around us. Then we can unabashedly step out in faith to love our brothers and sisters no matter how different. Then we can see the face of Christ, feel the love of the Father, and know the power of the Holy Spirit.

True community is being willing to love another unconditionally, serve another unselfishly, know another completely with all faults and darkness, and live together in honesty and harmony, all the while pressing on toward the goal of knowing Christ Jesus and the power of His death and resurrection.

I long for this type of relational community here in Atlanta. I grieve it's loss with my move away from Charlotte. I'll strive to find the "kindred" spirits that resonate with this ideal. I'll recklessly abandon myself to Christ in the waiting, and more so in the finding.

From a recent blog by Matt Conner:

In Ephesians, Paul prays for us to understand a few things about God and His Kingdom - one of those being “his vast inheritance in the saints…” That single line made me pause and seemed to flip everything around, suddenly causing miles of other passages to make sense (at least to me). The riches are His people. The inheritance to come can be found in the people being saved around us. Indeed, God’s most prized creation - man and woman - is indeed the treasure that Heaven will be full of.

Thus, you are my treasure, like it or not. And dreaming of “flying away” only keeps me from appreciating the beauty of you.

“The closest thing we have to Jesus on earth is one another.” Randall Goodgame

"To get in touch with the Creator, to truly appreciate Creation is to spend time with humanity." Eugene Peterson

Sophia Was a Wee Little Girl

2007-10-28T13:55:00.001-07:00

My little niece, Sophia, just had a birthday....she is 2!! I am missing out on most of her life and that makes me sad. Today, there is a big hole in my heart for my family. Sometimes I wonder why I have to live so far away. Sometimes I want to get into my car and just drive 12 long hours just to give them hugs. Sometimes I just want to be loved by the ones that will always be there for me unconditionally. There have been many people I've shared seasons with that hold a special place in my heart and I miss them more than I can express. But, today, I miss my family in Michigan....Mom, Dad, Deborah, Adam, Lindsey, Jakey, Fia, Jeff, Michelle, Calvin.....and there's a new little Schneider boy making his way into the world soon that will just be one more person for me to miss!

And not to forget, Laura, in DC....I cried today listening to:
"There's only us, there's only this, forget regret, or life is yours to miss....no other road, no other way, no day but today! There's only now, there's only here, give in to love, or live in fear...."

The Lord has brought me here to Atlanta.....I know that it is His will and I know that He will ease the pain. The joy is in the memories and the anticipation of reunion. It just boggles my mind that such "wee" little people can have such a BIG place in our hearts.....Happy Birthday Fia! I love you! and Happy Birthday Adam! Family, I'm coming home soon!

"Oh, what I would give, to have the things that mean the most not to mean the things I miss..." Indigo Girls (Language or the Kiss)

The Kingdom of Heaven Belongs to Such as These

2007-10-24T19:35:00.000-07:00

"The face of a child says it all, especially the mouth part of the face" Jack Handy

Oh, to have more of the joy of children, less of the weight of the "stuff of earth", more of the boldness, less of the fears, more of the FAITH that our Savior desires of us.......and more of the energy!

I'm tired, ironically, from working all day with children.....physically tired, but spiritually awake.....Lord, grant me faith like a child so that I can trust and obey without hesitancy or reservation.....have Your way in me!

Crab Legs and Breezes

2007-10-18T17:27:00.000-07:00

There's something oceanic about crab legs. I suppose it's a direct result of the crab having lived it's entire life in the ocean. (heheh) Tonight I had crab legs. I steamed 'em, cracked 'em, picked out the meat, dipped them in melted butter....mmmmm, good! I had originally hoped for someone to share them with, but, in lieu of human companionship, Christ pulled up a chair and dined with me. We had a beautiful date, we feasted, we talked, I gazed into His eyes. I opened all the windows in this apartment, and between the saltiness of the crab and the gentleness of the breeze, the Lord took my memories back to the ocean that I love to visit. His breeze is so refreshing to me. I wish we didn't have to settle for man made air-conditioning. I will always prefer the wind.....on the road or in my home. It reminds me of His freshness....of the way He enters my stuffiness and produces a beautiful aroma. I dreampt of the ocean and remembered the ways my God has met me standing on the shore. It was a satisfying evening of enjoying the company of my King, basking in His rest, and finding contentment in Christ.

I feel bad for people who are allergic to shellfish :(

"...maybe it's the way Your love swells beneath my skin, maybe it's the way my senses are full again....just as I am, You rush in without a warning, didn't think You would really want to come to this place, make it feel like a Sunday morning....." Sandra McCracken

Same God, different building!

2007-10-15T19:11:00.000-07:00

This is most of Mt. Tabor Christian Church (thus far)! We have been meeting in the basement of the pastor's home since March, 2007. God has blessed us with a new location that has windows! Although that can be distracting, I love seeing the sunshine! The outdoors remind me of God's majestic sovereignty and glorious beauty! The restaurant where we meet is a quaint upscale Italian Bistro called Quanto Basta, located in Cumming, GA. Check out our website: www.mttaborchristianchurch.org

So, we are few, but we are strong because of the bond of Christ. We have come far on this journey as a church and God has moved mountains to develop our characters. He has taught us about grace, mercy, loving one another, the judgment seat, the power of the Word, our spiritual gifts, ministry and service, the gospel, our sinfulness, His love, repentance, forgiveness, bearing each other's burdens, relationships, and reconciliation. But mostly He has brought us to the cross to learn more about His Son, Jesus, that He chose to die for us "while we were still sinners", so that we might experience the abundance of His resurrected life!

The biggest thing I've learned this year is the balance between knowing Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit. They are inseperable. It is imperative that we KNOW Christ in order to truly be led by the Spirit of the Living God, because the entire purpose of the Holy Spirit is to point us to Christ. (but that's another blog entirely)

We've only just begun and I am excited to watch expectantly as God continues to move in us, for us, and through us. He is mighty, holy, unchanging, beautiful, and sovereign. He is my first love and I will dance before my King. Praise the Lord for the wonders He has done. Press on Mt. Tabor! Rejoice in the truth of our Living God! Amen and amen.....

>"I will dance, I will sing, to be mad for my King.....and I'll become even more undignified than this......some may say it's foolishness...." Matt Redman

Though He slay me....

2007-10-15T18:54:00.000-07:00

*from September 10th, 2007:

I've been thinking recently about Job and how how much the Lord took away from Him......I sang "Blessed be Your name" at church this Sunday and was reminded of:
On the road marked with suffering, there is pain in the offering - blessed be Your name...
I was worshipping at Connexion Church last week and as the tears rushed forth like a pent up flood......I was struck with the amazement of my familiarity of praising God in the midst of suffering.......my mind recalled the first time I tried to praise God when I was hurting, and how difficult and unusual it was, but then how freeing and releasing at the same time.........These days I can't wait to raise up my hands and my voice to touch Him and cry out to Him......for "though He slay me, I will yet praise Him".....
On this great journey of sanctification, I will be thankful for the times of suffering, I will be welcoming of the pain, I will be armored for the battle, I will sing in the jail cell, I will be wrecked at the cross of Christ, so that I may dance at the empty tomb of the Risen and Living Lord.......I believe these sufferings in my life will indeed reveal more of His glory..........
Be magnified and glorified Jesus, in my life, for Your name's sake! Lead me on.......

invitation

2007-03-08T17:21:00.000-08:00

I consider myself to be a person of good intentions, a master of thoughtful plans, an over-organizer, and a micro-manager. The problem arises when the good intentions sit idle and remain just that (whether for myself or in service), the thoughtful planning becomes lofty and unattainable - leading to disappointment, the over-organizing gets out of hand and I do less creating due to an obsession with compartments, and the micro-managing doesn't allow me to trust anyone else to help me or work along side me.

So in an effort to allow myself to be constantly changed by the Shaper of my character, I want to record some of my thoughts here and invite you to come along this journey with me. I hope you will recognize the differences in me as I seek to follow harder after Christ. I hope you will disregard the amateurity of my blogging skills and the lack of word eloquency. I hope you will be encouraged, challenged, honed, and blessed for reading this. I pray you will see Jesus. I pray you will hear truth. I hope you will be changed from the inside out!

"My heart and my soul, I give You control, consume me from the inside out -
let justice and praise become my embrace, to love you from the inside out." Hillsong United